As all Gishers know, Medieval Knights were often depicted battling snails and nobody knows why… except you. YOU know. Show us a historical re-enactment that adequately explains this centuries-old rivalry.
A million years ago, or so
Is where I’ll set my tale
Of a knight most fair who became aware
Of our humble hero snail
The snail was a victim of the old caste system
Of systematic oppression
She prayed the knight would heed her plight
But soon she’d learn her lesson
“Sir Knight,” said she, “with your chivalry
Will you ‘ear me plea o’ woe?
Me family’s got naught t’ eat
We could use your ‘help, by jove!”
Well the knight said:
“OH FUCK A TALKING DEMON SNAIL KILL IT”